(Image courtesy: New Indian Express)There are 10 ways in which a batsman can get out in cricket. The 11th obviously is being bowled over by an actress. L Suresh attempts to offer some quasi-Freudian explanations to a simple question – ‘Why?’
The names of cricketers who have been (choose one) allegedly/ unfortunately/disastrously (take your pick) linked/married/stuck to actresses has provided enough grist to the rumour mill that has powered their journey all the way from Page 16 to Page 3. The list reads like a world-beating Dream Team, complete with openers, a middle-order, bowlers and allrounders - Gavaskar, Mohsin Khan, Richards, Pataudi, Yuvraj, Rohan Kanhai, Alvin Kalicharan, Sourav, Azhar, Sandeep Patil, Zaheer Khan, Shoaib Akthar, Gary Sobers, Ravi Shastri, Kapil Dev and Imran Khan. (137 other lesser-known names have been omitted to restrict the team to just 16 members.)
It’s rather difficult to explain the ‘who, what, why and how’ of this phenomenon. But as Freud once said, “Man who goes to movies sees stars.” It is by delving deep into the human mind and its fascination for the silver screen and the pretty young things that are added on for an item number, that one gets to understand the subtler implications of cricket meeting cinema. The easier way out, however, is to watch some of the biggest hits in recent times and understand how they have all been duly inspired by some of the stories that we already know about.
#1: Autograph – three’s company
Efforts are on to make the Hindi version of the highly successful Autograph. Zaheer Khan’s playing the lead, romancing Gauhar Khan, Rakshanda Khan and Isha Sharvani. The highlight of the film is Zaheer on a Suzuki Hayabusa 1300 CC riding through the roads of Switzerland singing the Hindi version of ‘Nyaabagam varudhey’. (This is a Hindi film, remember?)
#2: slegnA s‘eilrahC – three’s a crowd
Sorry, that’s the Urdu version of Charlie’s Angels, with Imran ‘Charlie’ Khan and his angels Zeenat Aman, Goldie Hawn and Jemima. After a nerve-wracking climax, Zeenat and Goldie fade in the sunset, Imran holds aloft a World Cup and the film dissolves into a montage of shimmering images that feature a large hospital – a scene that brings a lump to everyone’s throat.
#3: ‘Jo Jeetu wohi Sikandar – the Jumping Jack Complex
It’s surely not the fault of an actress if she has to run after/run with/run away from a hero dressed in all white down to his shoes, all day. That’s the reason why she continues to chase men in white. This forms the plot for the film ‘Jo Jeetu wohi Sikandar’. Ravi Shastri and Shoaib Akthar are vying to play hero. Last heard, Shoaib even missed a match Down Under and was seen boogeying in a disco, to ensure that he played the role of Jumping Jack to perfection. Meanwhile Ravi is banking on the fact that he could keep his clothes spotless white even at the end of a match, to help him grab the role of the ‘man in white’.
#4: Dil ke Carib – a calypso summer
Even as Amitabh was battling his confusion over ‘Robert’ and ‘Andy Roberts’ in Amar Akbar Anthony, the likes of Gary Sobers and Richards had already created enough chaos amongst the whole lot of us with a heady mix of affairs, actresses and other key ‘issues’. So while our batsmen organized the processions from the pavilion to the pitch and back, the West Indians took charge of the Carribean Carnival – on and off the field.
#5: Shabd – when words fail
Any comparison made between jargon used in the film industry and in cricket would reveal how much the two have in common - shot, hit, draw, lights, (making a) silly point, (shaking a) fine leg, reaching a hundred, contract, brand ambassador, ad film, Bhai, Du-bhai… In spite of all this, there are times when words fail to cement relationships. That’s the plot of Shabd, the story of people who lose the plot as they run out of words. Mohsin Khan, Yuvi and Dada are in the reckoning for the plum role of the strong, silent type.
It’s rather difficult to explain the ‘who, what, why and how’ of this phenomenon. But as Freud once said, “Man who goes to movies sees stars.” It is by delving deep into the human mind and its fascination for the silver screen and the pretty young things that are added on for an item number, that one gets to understand the subtler implications of cricket meeting cinema. The easier way out, however, is to watch some of the biggest hits in recent times and understand how they have all been duly inspired by some of the stories that we already know about.
#1: Autograph – three’s company
Efforts are on to make the Hindi version of the highly successful Autograph. Zaheer Khan’s playing the lead, romancing Gauhar Khan, Rakshanda Khan and Isha Sharvani. The highlight of the film is Zaheer on a Suzuki Hayabusa 1300 CC riding through the roads of Switzerland singing the Hindi version of ‘Nyaabagam varudhey’. (This is a Hindi film, remember?)
#2: slegnA s‘eilrahC – three’s a crowd
Sorry, that’s the Urdu version of Charlie’s Angels, with Imran ‘Charlie’ Khan and his angels Zeenat Aman, Goldie Hawn and Jemima. After a nerve-wracking climax, Zeenat and Goldie fade in the sunset, Imran holds aloft a World Cup and the film dissolves into a montage of shimmering images that feature a large hospital – a scene that brings a lump to everyone’s throat.
#3: ‘Jo Jeetu wohi Sikandar – the Jumping Jack Complex
It’s surely not the fault of an actress if she has to run after/run with/run away from a hero dressed in all white down to his shoes, all day. That’s the reason why she continues to chase men in white. This forms the plot for the film ‘Jo Jeetu wohi Sikandar’. Ravi Shastri and Shoaib Akthar are vying to play hero. Last heard, Shoaib even missed a match Down Under and was seen boogeying in a disco, to ensure that he played the role of Jumping Jack to perfection. Meanwhile Ravi is banking on the fact that he could keep his clothes spotless white even at the end of a match, to help him grab the role of the ‘man in white’.
#4: Dil ke Carib – a calypso summer
Even as Amitabh was battling his confusion over ‘Robert’ and ‘Andy Roberts’ in Amar Akbar Anthony, the likes of Gary Sobers and Richards had already created enough chaos amongst the whole lot of us with a heady mix of affairs, actresses and other key ‘issues’. So while our batsmen organized the processions from the pavilion to the pitch and back, the West Indians took charge of the Carribean Carnival – on and off the field.
#5: Shabd – when words fail
Any comparison made between jargon used in the film industry and in cricket would reveal how much the two have in common - shot, hit, draw, lights, (making a) silly point, (shaking a) fine leg, reaching a hundred, contract, brand ambassador, ad film, Bhai, Du-bhai… In spite of all this, there are times when words fail to cement relationships. That’s the plot of Shabd, the story of people who lose the plot as they run out of words. Mohsin Khan, Yuvi and Dada are in the reckoning for the plum role of the strong, silent type.
(Appeared in the New Indian Express Sunday Supplement as The Game of Love on 13 Feb, 2005)
No comments:
Post a Comment